Tonight after giving my son a bath, he was so smiley/happy and he (like most 3ish month olds probably do?) LOVES looking in the mirror. So I wrapped him in a towel and we played in front of the mirror for a minute. While making faces at him, trying to get him to laugh I snapped a few pictures.
After that came the typical routine that follows bath time; got his diaper, lotion, & jammies on then I had him play on his activity mat for a few. All those events took the energy right out of our sweet baby. He snuggled up on my lap for a little snooze.
As he fell asleep I went to look at the pictures I had taken. He looks SO CUTE (per usual) and we both look SO HAPPY (because we are) but as I examine the pictures a little closer to decide if I should post one, my whole thought process almost instantly changed. Instead of focusing on how happy we were I found myself thinking “ugh it looks like I’m still pregnant in this picture, my pooch is huge”, “my hair looks so greasy and eye bags are real”, “my arm is like the size of his whole body, I look so unhealthy”…. and right as I started to decide that I would just keep it as a memory picture and not post it because of my insecurities something came over me. I don’t know if it’s Gods way of reminding me to love myself or if it was a boost of confidence inspired by the many inspiring women I follow (especially Cat&Nat, Nikita Lang, Foodie Girl Fitness, & Kaitlin Tookey Palmer), or my husbands voice in the back of my mind saying “you’re perfect just the way you are”. But SOMETHING made me change my mind or as my favorite comedian John Crist would say “check my heart”.
The truth is I gained “too much” weight during my pregnancy. I had PLENTY of people inform me that “they gained 35lbs and it was so hard” or that “In their day you were only supposed to gain 20ish lbs”, I had my Dr. constantly reminding me to watch what I eat because he was concerned about how rapidly I was gaining, and I went from a size Large to a size 3XL in 10 months time. I didn’t go overboard on eating or live on my couch or anything crazy like that but my body held on to every single calorie until just like that, I had gained 85lbs and didn’t even recognize the woman looking back at me in the mirror. But I’m not focusing on that tonight, I’m focusing on this:
⁃ I GREW A PERSON AND CARRIED THEM IN MY BODY FOR 40 WEEKS.
⁃ I GAVE BIRTH TO A BEAUTIFUL, HAPPY, HEALTHY BABY BOY!
⁃ I AM A DAUGHTER OF GOD, A LOYAL WIFE, A LOVING MOM, A HARD WORKER & MY APPEARANCE DOES NOT DEFINE ME.
My main man Tim McGraw said it best when he said “I ain’t as good as I’m gonna get, but I’m better than I used to be.” I’ve lost 37lbs since bringing Avery into this world and I don’t mind my stretch marks anymore. I’m not in love with the way I look but I’m proud of my body and all it has gotten me through in this life. I refuse to let society’s expectations or my own insecurities hold me back from sharing joyful memories with my sweet babe. I’m thankful for whatever came over me tonight and hope that reading this reminds at least one person to BE PROUD OF YOUR MOM BOD, you earned it and your appearance doesn’t define you either. 💙
PS. The reason I’m not wearing a shirt, is because I’m a new mom and I’m just not skilled enough to give Avery a bath and get him out without getting my shirt soaking wet so I just take my shirt off to give him a bath. 😂
PSS. No I am NOT interested in trying Thrive, ItWorks, Beach Body, or any other MLM weight loss product at this time.